Friday Mar 08, 2024

#130 Loneliness and hoarding with Vassia Sarantopoulou: build human connections and combat hoarding-related shame

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Episode transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/


Today, I look at the link between loneliness and hoarding behaviour with special guest Vassia Sarantopoulou, an expert psychologist and relationship counsellor. Come on a thought-provoking journey as Vassia and I discuss the complexities of loneliness, and practical steps for combating the shame associated with hoarding. There's the deep impact of societal expectations on emotional expression and emphasise the importance of forming genuine human connections for those affected by hoarding.


From identifying warning signs of loneliness to exploring the link between trauma, grief, and hoarding, this episode offers insights into the struggles faced by individuals dealing with compulsive hoarding and the loneliness that often accompanies it.


Vassia shares effective strategies for overcoming loneliness, reaching out for support, and finding ways to rebuild connections when you hoard.


This episode is a candid and compassionate exploration of the intersection between loneliness and hoarding, offering support for those seeking to break the cycle.


  • Loneliness and Its Impact
  • Stigma and Misconceptions Surrounding Loneliness
  • Two Layers of Loneliness: Normal Feeling vs. Deeper Sense of Loneliness
  • Common Causes of Loneliness
  • Overcoming the Fear of Rejection and Making New Friends
  • Difficulties in Discussing Personal Struggles with Friends
  • Importance of Creating Safe Spaces for Discussing Grief and Negative Emotions
  • Combatting Shame and Overcoming Self-Judgment
  • Steps to Combat Shame Associated with Hoarding Behaviour
  • Impact of Societal Expectations on Emotional Expression
  • Building Human Connections and Combatting Feelings of Shame Associated with Hoarding Behaviour
  • Practical Steps to Build Human Connections and Combat Feelings of Shame Associated with Hoarding Behaviour
  • Addressing Shame and Overcoming Self-Imposed Judgment Related to Hoarding
  • Gradual Approach to Disclosing Hoarding in Relationships
  • Practical Advice and Resources
  • Purpose of Social Activities: Engaging in Activities to Reduce Pressure and Stress
  • Building Relationships and Disclosing Hoarding: Choosing the Right Moment and Managing Expectations
  • Taking a Gradual Approach to Disclosing Hoarding in Relationships
  • Impact of Hoarding Symptoms on Loneliness
  • Warning Signs of Loneliness and Isolation
  • Mental and Physical Health Effects of Loneliness
  • Seeking Harmful or Unhealthy Relationships Due to Loneliness
  • The Contribution of Trauma, Grief, and Loss to Hoarding Behaviour and Loneliness
  • Dual layers of loneliness lead to isolation.
  • Loneliness stems from disconnecting from ourselves.
  • Impact of loneliness mental and physical health.
  • Loneliness and trauma can lead to hoarding.
  • Reconnect with old friends, join social groups.
  • Healing involves selective sharing and seeking help.
  • Guide, allow time, ask, express, connect authentically.
  • Layered loneliness: valuing connections, deeper isolation, worthiness doubts, fear, rationalisation.
  • Relying solely on objects for emotional needs
  • Neglecting physical appearance
  • Changes in sleep
  • Loss of interest in activities
  • Hopelessness or helplessness.
  • Traumatic experiences can lead to hoarding and social isolation as a protective mechanism.
  • People in healing choose carefully who to share with


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